Daughters

Sally pulls her arms tighter around herself, shivering as the cool night breeze picks up off the water.

"It's almost midnight and here we are, out fishing in the dark," Sally says, scooting closer to John on the boat seat, seeking his warmth. "I always thought you were one of those crack-of-dawn fishermen types?"

"Well, there's really only one bad time to go fishing," John replies with a slight grin, "and that's when they ain't biting. Right now they're biting, so it's a good time. Though I'll admit, my fishing schedule has gotten a bit more... creative since Penelope came along."

"Yeah, that little girl sort of changed everything, didn't she?" Sally's voice grows quieter. "Sometimes I feel guilty about that whole situation."

"Guilty?" John looks at her with genuine confusion. "What on earth could you feel guilty about?"

"Think about it - before we fixed the Earth, there weren't any babies born here. None. But then somebody," she pauses, pointing to herself, "namely me, I think, went and changed all that. I'm not even sure that was supposed to be part of the plan, you know? The plan was saving Nettie and restoring the planet. But I think some woman whose biological clock was starting to tick pretty loudly decided to just throw childbirth in as a little bonus feature." She stares out at the dark water. "What if having kids here was never supposed to happen? What if I've basically set up Penelope, and all these other children, for some horrible existence that should never have been? What do you honestly think about that?"

"I think you're full of shit, is what I think," John says bluntly, but his tone is warm. "Penelope is such an incredible blessing. All these new kids are. And honestly? I think they're the key to making re-population actually work. Without them, all the souls here would just go back to Earth eventually and start the exact same mess all over again, right where they left off. But dealing with children - especially teenagers like Penelope and Anahere - it changes you fundamentally. You're not the same person you were before you had them, and you're definitely better for it. So even if it really was just your decision to make this happen, I'd call it a stroke of pure genius."

"Maybe you're right. But here's what keeps me up at night - do we even understand the full scope of what we've done? The little world we know here represents such a tiny, tiny fraction of this whole level 5 domain that we can't possibly judge the total impact just by looking at our own situation. Think about this: there were twelve and a half billion souls on planet Earth at the beginning of 2052. By early 2054, there were maybe five hundred million left. Twelve billion people perished in that war, John. I'm assuming they all ended up here somewhere in level 5.

"By my time - around 2120 or so - Earth's population had bounced back to about a billion, with another hundred million already living on Mars. But here's what haunts me: if you look at the domains we're familiar with, they're mostly populated by souls from the nineteenth and twentieth centuries, plus those from what we call the Great Influx. Most of our local cluster consists of like-minded, post-industrial people from relatively modern eras. Since these domains seem to organize themselves around shared mindsets and experiences, doesn't that mean there are probably clusters of domains populated mostly by victims of that war? They couldn't have recycled back yet because Earth's population was too small to accommodate them. So maybe... maybe those domains are still locked in that same war, one that never really ended but just followed them here to level 5. Maybe they're all still wandering around in a traumatic daze, suffering from psychological injuries that haven't healed. These are the kinds of questions that keep racing through my mind, and nobody seems to have the first clue how to answer them."

"Wow," John says with a low chuckle. "You're really getting deep into this Council work, aren't you? You're starting to sound just like them - in a good way, though." His expression grows more serious. "You know, some souls that arrive here through extreme trauma - like getting blown to pieces in a war - they actually sleep through most of their stay here. We have to wake them up before we can send them back to Earth. And sometimes they carry a lot of that trauma back with them when they go." He pauses. "Like you said, we didn't get many souls from that twenty-first century war in our area. Tell me more about what happened. What could possibly possess humanity to literally blow themselves up like that?"

"Oh man, that was a huge subject in all our history classes, and I don't think the scholars ever really figured it out completely. The basic theory was that the world's population had grown so massive that it hit some kind of critical tipping point - you had constant, desperate competition for resources at exactly the time when the planet's resource capacity was declining rapidly. It's like the entire human race went collectively insane and started this frenzied fight for whatever was left. But it didn't stop with fighting over resources. Once people got into that killing mindset, they just kept going and going and going until virtually nothing was left alive. Every major population center on the planet was completely annihilated.

"Since so many cities were built along coastlines, some genius military strategists developed these top-secret weapons called seismic nukes. They could deploy whole arrays of these bombs in the ocean along a coastline, timed to detonate in precisely calculated sequences that would focus all that explosive energy into creating absolutely massive tsunami waves. So picture this: all the people in a coastal city would see is this two-mile-high wall of water racing toward them at incredible speed. When the water finally receded, there would be nothing left but sand and twisted steel foundations. The problem with a weapon like that is once you use it even once, every other country can reverse-engineer the technology and have the same weapon operational within weeks. So basically, they turned water itself into the ultimate weapon of mass destruction - washing entire cities into the ocean, drying up freshwater sources so people would die of thirst, poisoning water supplies. Most of the killing was done through manipulating water in some way. There were also tons of conspiracy theories claiming it was all orchestrated by a small group of ultra-wealthy people who wanted to eliminate most of the population so they could rule over what remained. Who really knows if that's true?

"What I do know is that by my time, we had almost completely recovered population-wise. The specific type of warfare they used was designed primarily to kill people, animals, and vegetation - it didn't destroy most of the technological infrastructure. All the major cities were gone, sure, but there was more than enough technology scattered throughout rural areas to keep civilization running. We ended up with this high-tech planet that had way more resources than the surviving population could ever use. Over ninety percent of Earth's species had gone extinct, but those that survived had abundant food and space. Humans basically became baby-making machines. Everyone who was physically capable of having children did so - one after another after another - and most of those babies survived to adulthood and started having their own kids.

"By my era, our population had doubled since the end of the war. It was this crazy, intensive baby-boom period. Of course, there was still massive pollution from the war itself and from the pre-war industrial period that was making people sick, plus we had started creating significant new pollution ourselves. Environmental health was becoming a major crisis all over again."

"You know what?" Sally laughs, but there's a nervous edge to it. "I really am starting to sound like a Council representative, aren't I? I guess I have to learn to speak their language, otherwise they'll never understand what I'm trying to communicate. This is the responsibility that's been placed on my shoulders, and you know me - I always clean my plate. But I'm absolutely terrified about Penelope. She's had such a pleasant, protected life so far, but she's growing up fast and she has no idea what kind of challenges she might be facing. None of us have any clue what she and the other children born here are going to encounter. So how do we prepare them for something completely unknown? She's adapted to the modern lifestyle in Capitol City like she was born for it.

"It really does seem like that urban environment is her natural habitat. But it could be hundreds of years - maybe much longer - before that kind of sophisticated society can be rebuilt on Earth. If she eventually goes back there, how is she going to survive growing her own food, washing her clothes by hand in a bucket, having her entire life dictated by unpredictable weather patterns and other harsh natural realities? I honestly don't see how to prepare her for that kind of existence. I don't think she'd survive it. And some days, I don't even feel like I know who she really is. One minute she's acting like a typical fourteen-year-old, the next she's reverting to childish four-year-old behavior, and then suddenly she's displaying the wisdom and maturity of someone in their forties. It's like she's three completely different people inhabiting one body, and you never know which version you're going to be talking to. You raised three daughters during difficult times, when you didn't have cars or television or computers. You're going to have to help me figure out how to get Penelope and a whole bunch of other kids ready for a world that's going to be shockingly harsh in ways they can't possibly imagine.

"Tell me about your daughters, John. How did you prepare them for life at the end of the nineteenth century?" Sally asks.

"It wasn't easy, I'll tell you that," John replies thoughtfully. "But I think they all turned out pretty well in the end. They were stubborn and opinionated, and Lord knows we bickered constantly - just like Penelope does - but we got through it and they all grew into good, strong women. Their names were Alannah, Elina, and Brionna.

"Alannah was my firstborn. She always acted so friendly and fearless, like nothing in the world could intimidate her. Truth was, she was actually afraid of almost everything, but that fear never slowed her down one bit. She'd just do whatever needed doing, scared or not. Among her group of friends, she was always the natural leader - the one coming up with ideas and, more often than not, the one getting them all into trouble. Alannah found herself in hot water regularly, but it was never anything truly serious, just mischievous stuff because she was so intensely curious about everything life had to offer and wanted to experience it all as quickly as possible. She did okay with her school studies, but book learning just wasn't where her talents lay.

"She was incredibly social - that was her real gift, creating connections between people and building relationships. When she got older, pretty much every young man in our little community had their eye on Alannah, and she knew exactly how to handle that attention. She was always playing them against each other, making them compete for her notice. She thought it was all just a fun game, but I had to warn her that these were rough, hot-tempered young men we're talking about, and sooner or later they were going to start pulling out their guns and shooting each other if she kept playing those kinds of dangerous games. Fortunately, she eventually found one she genuinely cared about and settled down to marry him, and all that childish manipulation stopped."

"Elina was my second daughter, only about fourteen months younger than Alannah. She was definitely a daddy's girl from the start. Alannah always stayed close to her mother, so I guess Elina gravitated toward me because I was more available to her. Those two girls, being so close in age, fought like cats and dogs. One minute they'd be inseparable best friends, and the next they'd be screaming and throwing things at each other. I'd come home from work and find Akasha sitting on the porch with Elina beside her. Akasha would just look at me and say, 'Take care of your daughter!' then march back into the house. Elina would be standing there looking all sad and staring at the ground, so I'd know immediately that some major altercation had taken place and Akasha had to physically separate them to restore peace. Sometimes Akasha would insist that I punish Elina, but I never did. We'd just go to our special quiet places and talk through whatever had happened.

"Elina was extremely sensitive to anything she perceived as unfair - usually situations where her sister got to have or do things that Elina was supposedly too young for, or privileges that Alannah received simply because she was the firstborn. I'd try to explain that life just isn't fair, and if we go through expecting it to be, we're going to live a very sad and disappointed existence.

"Elina was by far the most beautiful of my daughters - the kind of stunning girl who could make a man ride his horse straight into a ditch because he was staring at her instead of watching where he was going. Akasha would deliberately dress her in the dumpiest, most shapeless old clothes she could find, but Elina knew instinctively how to move her body when she walked, and she had this cute little natural sway that would shine through the ugliest outfit Akasha could put together. Elina would do just about anything for male attention, and she was especially drawn to boys that Alannah liked. I never actually caught her in the act, but I was pretty sure she was sneaking off with some of the local boys.

"I found her a suitable husband and got her married before she could get herself into the kind of serious trouble that would have brought shame on our family. That was Akasha's biggest fear - that Elina would get involved in some scandal that would embarrass us in the community. Elina and her mother were never very close. I think they saw each other as competition, honestly. Akasha would sometimes get jealous of the attention I gave Elina, but that didn't stop me from being there for her. There were plenty of nights I barely slept, lying awake thinking about all the different kinds of trouble she might be getting herself into. But she made it through to adulthood without getting killed or getting anyone else killed, and she ended up with a good man who seemed to make her genuinely happy."

"Akasha and I decided to try one more time to see if we could finally have a son, but instead we got Brionna. The older girls were six and seven when Brionna was born, so they helped take care of her like she was their own personal living doll. Akasha formed an incredibly strong bond with the baby, which created some tension with the older girls who started feeling left out and neglected - Elina especially felt displaced. I began spending more focused time with Alannah and Elina, and when my work wasn't too dangerous, I'd take them along with me. The little local school we had didn't always have a teacher available, so their formal education was pretty sporadic. Most of the young men in that area had never received any schooling at all, so the girls didn't see much practical value in book learning either.

"Brionna grew up to be quite the little prima donna - absolutely spoiled rotten by her doting mother and her care-giving big sisters, always expecting things to just be done for her automatically. That created some real problems when she got older and actually had to start doing things independently. None of my girls were particularly enthusiastic about housework, but Brionna was by far the worst. The only time I'd see Akasha get truly stern with her was when Brionna went into one of her lazy phases and simply refused to lift a finger to help with anything. Eventually I found her a husband who was more than happy to treat her like a princess and take care of her every need, so I guess that arrangement worked out well for everyone.

"Those three girls really transformed who Akasha and I became as people. Before the girls started attending school, the best I could manage was scribbling my own name, and Akasha didn't know which end of a pencil to hold when it came to writing anything. So we learned right alongside our daughters - how to read a little, how to write basic letters. After the girls moved away and started their own families, they could still stay in touch by writing letters back and forth. I never developed enough skill to read correspondence myself, but Akasha would read their letters aloud to me."

"Alannah, Elina, and Brionna - those names all sound pretty similar. Wasn't that confusing day-to-day?" Sally asks with amusement.

"Nope, not really," John replies with a hearty laugh. "We'd just holler 'GIRLS!' at the top of our lungs. Then we'd sort them out when they all came running to see what we wanted."

"Have you ever tried to find them here in level 5?" Sally asks more seriously.

"I looked for Akasha for a while after you first mentioned the possibility, but from what I could determine, she's gone. She recycled back to the planet, and the Akasha I knew and loved is now long gone and forgotten forever. I haven't really searched for my daughters yet. I'm expecting to discover the same thing about them - that they've all recycled back as well - and I honestly don't want to deal with the disappointment of looking for them and then confirming that they're gone.

"You know, that's one of the changes I've noticed since you folks adjusted these domains. Back on Earth, when somebody died, you'd mourn their loss intensely and carry this huge empty hole in your heart that nothing else could ever fill. But here, when someone cycled back to Earth, even if they'd been your closest friend, you wouldn't give it a second thought. After they disappeared, it was as if they had never existed here at all. Now that's completely changed. Now we experience real grief when we lose someone who goes back. That's going to create serious problems with re-population - those of us remaining here being genuinely sad and heartbroken when our loved ones vanish and forget who they used to be. That's going to require some major psychological readjustment, and I think it's going to be really difficult to handle. You're the expert on this stuff, Sally. What are your thoughts about that challenge?"

"I think as humanity continues to evolve, maybe this whole forgetfulness mechanism won't be necessary anymore. Maybe eventually we'll be able to recover these forgotten aspects of ourselves and actually know our complete history across multiple lifetimes. I understand that at our current level of psychological and spiritual development, remembering everything would just rekindle ancient fears and feuds and wars and all kinds of destructive patterns. But I'm really hoping we can evolve beyond that limitation - that someday we'll be able to integrate our whole self across all our experiences and still remain at peace. I think that's going to take quite a while though. I'm not at all convinced we're anywhere near evolved enough for re-population, much less for recovering our complete multi-lifetime memories. Okay, so getting back to our girls - Penelope and Anahere. Which of your daughters are they most similar to? What should I be prepared for with them?"

"Those two are very different from each other, but if I had to make a comparison, I'd say they're both like all three of my daughters rolled into one complex personality - sort of like their adoptive mother, Sally."

"So which one is most likely to start sneaking off with boys?"

"That would probably be Penelope. The call of the wild runs pretty strong in that one."

"Shit! I was afraid you were going to say that. So how do I prevent that from happening?"

"Well first, don't automatically assume it's inevitable, because that kind of expectation can actually make it more likely to occur. Just being consistently present and available is the most important thing you can do. Make sure she always has plenty of engaging activities and projects to keep her occupied, so she doesn't have idle time to start obsessing about boys. If you get completely absorbed in Council responsibilities and don't have quality time for the girls, they'll both definitely get into mischief - that's guaranteed. But the main thing is to prepare yourself mentally and emotionally to handle it constructively if she does go down that path. Kids aren't prepared for how overwhelming these romantic and sexual feelings can be, and they make mistakes based on inexperience. You've got to keep loving them unconditionally and work through these situations together when they arise. The worst thing you can do is shelter them so completely that they never get a chance to actually live their own lives and learn from experience. The other worst thing you can do is reject or hate them when they inevitably screw up.

"Young people discovering their sexuality is actually a beautiful, natural part of human development, even if they happen to sneak off into the woods before they're officially married. You should honor that as an important part of who they are and not make them feel dirty or guilty about their natural desires. I know that's incredibly hard to do when it's your precious, perfect little baby and you feel like she's being corrupted somehow. But ultimately it's her life and she has to live it according to her own choices and learn from her own experiences. One practical thing you can do is make sure that when she has questions about personal, intimate topics, you give her honest, complete answers. That way she has reliable, experienced information to work with instead of having to figure everything out on her own through trial and error."

"I've tried having those conversations, and all I get is this long 'ewwwwwwwww' sound and a disgusted expression."

"Yep, that's completely normal. They don't want to think about their mother as a sexual being any more than you want to imagine them in those situations. Just keep making yourself available and offering information when appropriate, and you'll start to notice that she comes to you more and more often with questions. Just don't faint or panic when she asks the really difficult, explicit ones. If you can't handle answering her, she's going to end up asking her father, and I guarantee you he's not prepared for those conversations."

"Well, be ready, John. When she starts asking the really tough, embarrassing questions, I'm sending her straight to your house."

"I'll be prepared for anything. I always am. There's nothing that could possibly come out of that girl's mouth that would shock me - not after raising the three daughters I did."

"How do you feel about Anahere being part of our family now? How do you think that's going to affect Penelope's development?"

"I think Anahere is absolutely wonderful, and honestly the best thing that could have possibly happened for Penelope. I learned from watching my own daughters that they were much healthier and better adjusted having sisters to grow up with. Sure, they fought constantly and I'm sure we'll have to physically separate these girls from time to time when they really go at each other, but that's completely normal. It's actually good for them to get that kind of rage and frustration out of their systems in a safe family environment, rather than getting into serious fights with strangers where they could be genuinely hurt. All of us love Anahere already. If you hadn't adopted her, Ben and I probably would have gotten into our own scuffle over who got to take her in."

"That's really good to know. I didn't want to just dump this responsibility on you guys without knowing how you felt, but it sounds like you were already prepared to welcome her anyway. It definitely looks like she's here to stay for the long term. Penelope and Anahere have bonded in such an intense way that they're practically inseparable now. I'm also much more comfortable with the idea of them traveling together as a pair than either of them going places alone. We can't chaperone them forever, after all. Now that they have each other for support and accountability, I'm actually thinking about enrolling them both at that university in Capitol City. That should keep their active minds busy and challenged."

John thinks quietly for a moment, starting to pack up his fishing gear. The air is getting colder and the fish have stopped biting entirely. "I think the university experience will be excellent for both of them. They'll probably meet some nice young men there too. But the most important life lessons - those we still need to teach them ourselves. Children are born naturally expecting love and knowing instinctively how to accept and receive love. But they have to be deliberately taught how to give love to others. They're extremely sensitive about their own feelings and emotions, and they'll usually tell you immediately when they feel hurt or upset. But they must be taught genuine compassion for other people's feelings. They'll happily take everything you're willing to give them without question. They absolutely must be taught gratitude and appreciation for what they receive. If you wait for a child to spontaneously show appreciation, you could literally wait forever.

"You must actively teach them how to feel genuine appreciation and how to express it appropriately. Their physical womanhood will develop naturally on its own. But you must show them how to conduct themselves as ladies. They'll eventually decide for themselves what they believe is right and wrong morally. But you must show them that other people's opinions and beliefs may be completely different from theirs but equally valid and deserving of respect. You must teach them how to fight passionately for what they believe in while still respecting and honoring the beliefs of others. They're both uncommonly beautiful girls, and you and they should be genuinely proud of that gift. But they must also be taught that in the larger scheme of life, their physical beauty means absolutely nothing in terms of their real value as human beings. These are just a few of the crucial lessons they're definitely not going to learn at any university. This part of their education is entirely our responsibility.

"Here's a fundamental set of principles I learned through raising my three daughters, and we need to apply them consistently with Penelope and Anahere: Love them, Honor them, Respect them, and Protect them. I think most parents instinctively understand those concepts, but what I had to learn through experience was that I had to prioritize them in exactly that order. If I made protecting my girls my number one priority above everything else, it would actually prevent them from living their own authentic lives. That would be fundamentally disrespecting them as individuals who have the right to learn and grow from their own mistakes and experiences. It would dishonor them by essentially saying that only I was wise enough or good enough to make important decisions for them, and that they weren't intelligent enough or capable enough to make those choices independently. That's not really loving them at all. That's potentially destroying their ability to become fully realized adults.

"In order to properly love, honor, and respect them, you have to deliberately pull back somewhat on the protective instinct. You have to allow them to experience some genuine danger and take some real risks, so they can learn and grow and develop their own judgment and capabilities. So remember this always: Love them, Honor them, Respect them, and Protect them - IN EXACTLY THAT ORDER. It's an incredibly challenging balance to maintain, but with practice and conscious effort, I'm confident you'll figure out how to get it right."

Sally helps John gather up the fishing equipment and carry it back up to the house. It's getting quite late now, and they're both tired from the long day. Tomorrow is a work day in the City, and they'll need to be rested and ready. But it's been a good day overall - productive conversations, time spent together, and maybe even some wisdom shared that will help with the challenges ahead.